Guide to Surviving College With A Baby

After a semester of balancing baby and school work, I feel like an expert on this topic. It was pretty intimidating when I first started, but once I was settled and learned the routine, it really wasn't that bad. It may not be the same as back in the pre-baby days, but it definitely works. How do you do it? It is pretty simple really.

 Step 1

Find a Sitter You Love and Feel Comfortable With

Figuring out who should be responsible for the little bundle of joy is not as simple as picking out what to eat for breakfast. There are many things to take in to consideration. Whether you do decide to leave the baby with a trusted family member, a nanny or a reputable daycare, make sure it’s a good fit before classes start. The middle of English Composition class is not the ideal moment for wondering how many times your little one has been fed and changed in the last few hours.
It's very important that you are able to clearly focus and participate in class. A little separation anxiety-from both you and baby- is normal and to be expected, but both of you should be happy and comfortable with your sitter. Trust is fundamental so don’t be afraid to explore all your options.

Step 2

Get Organized

Before bedtime, the night before is the best time to begin collecting and organizing everything you and your baby will need in the morning. Waiting until the last minute can start the day off feeling rushed and stressed. It's not possible to predict and plan ahead for everything the morning might throw your way, but you can minimize on stress by preparing as much as possible. Find all your textbooks and notebooks, pick out clothes the night before, restock the diaper bag, pack lunch and snacks and prepare bottles.

Step 3

Prepare for Class

Pre-read the chapter before class and if the teacher uploads the power-points online, print out ahead of time. If you already have some idea of what the teacher is going to go over in class, you will be more focused and have a step up on everyone else in class. It's not necessary for you to master the material before class but do try to have a general idea of what is going to be taught.

Step 4

Pay Attention and Take Really Good Notes In Class

The more you learn in class, the less studying you will have to do at home. There will be days when despite best intentions, you will not be able to study. There will be nights when sleep is a wishful thought and mornings that drag. For those days when dragging yourself to class is all that can be accomplished, you will be grateful for not feeling lost and understanding the lesson.
If you don’t have good note taking skills, now is the time to learn and perfect. Tip, make sure to write down anything the teacher repeats multiple times and everything they write on the board. After a while you should get used to the individual teacher's style and know what to expect in terms of material on the tests and quizzes. Some teachers are very lecture oriented, others stick to the textbook. You’ll have to find out your teacher’s style.

Step 5

Maximize Study Time

The best way to study, along with how long, varies from person to person. It depends greatly on your own learning style. I advise you to take full advantage of any services offered by your college such as tutoring, quiet area in library to study, media center and study groups. When you find something that works for you, stick with it.
I discovered that I could not study at home. The baby was always doing one of the following: 
being irresistibly cute, getting into trouble or needing something. However, I quickly learned that I could accomplish quite a bit in a short time. Having 6 hours of uninterrupted study time is a luxury few parents have. However after awhile, you’ll also be amazed at the amount of studying you can get done in 1 hour, especially if you’ve taken good notes. Speaking of, make sure to review your notes as well as read your textbook.

Step 6

Do Not and I Repeat Do Not Procrastinate

Tip, if your teacher allows you turn assignments in early, do it. Most likely you will have to work on longer assignments, such as essays, in multiple chunks. Do not wait until the night before it is due. 

Step 7

Get To Know Your Teacher and Let Them Know You Are a Parent

The purpose is not to get special treatment. Teachers are usually very willing to work with good students and they appreciate honesty. If you consistently are on time for class and generally do well on the assignments, and end up coming in to class one day very late because of a sick baby, the teacher will most likely be understanding after you've explained. 

Step 8

Don’t Forget To Have A Good Time

College is stressful for everyone. It’s not meant to be easy, but that doesn’t mean it should be misery. Get to know your classmates and have a good time. School can be a lot of fun if you let it be.

Another Semester Finished, Soon To Be Filed Away

Another semester has come to a close. I'm pretty impressed with myself to have completed my classes while taking care of Frogger. It's no easy task. I was disappointed last fall when I was not able to continue with the 2 online classes. I'm very happy to have been able to finish all of this semester. College wasn't meant to be easy, not even living on campus in a dorm within walking distance of the library. College between diaper changes, breastfeeding, nap time and mornings that began with being thrown up on, that is a whole different story.

Congratulations to all the other student parents that are out there. We did good.

 I think I have finally found my major! After all this time I've realized that accounting might be my calling. I do enjoy sociology, my current major, but I don't want to be a social worker. Having a new direction keeps me at a community college for a little while longer. I have earned 60 units now, but I'd rather take the basic accounting and business classes for a fraction of the cost, even if it means sacrificing a few credits/units that won't transfer.

It's Not So Easy

I often wonder why life isn't easy. If it's not one thing, it's another. That's the way it always goes. I'm still in California. I was supposed to leave a long time ago.

I'm not going to school full time this season. I'm taking pre-calculus and sociology which ends up at being just a little over half time. My classes are on my laptop and I work on my schoolwork after the baby falls asleep at night. She doesn't allow me to do anything constructive during the day. Anything other than love her to death and layer her in kisses, all while swinging back and forth, and back and forth on the patio swing.

It's not an easy adjustment from being an active teen to a mother. The impulsive lifestyle doesn't work with nap times and feedings and that's not a good environment for a baby anyhow. I handle it well mostly, but I do suffer from loneliness. Almost all of my friends live 1000 miles away. Even when my parents try to coax me out of the house, I feel as if I have no one to share the nightlife with. Honestly just a buddy to go to the park with in the daytime would be nice.

It's also hard taking care of the baby, minus the dad. I've seen him a total of 5 weeks in the last 6 months. I could leave here and join him, but like I said, life just isn't that easy. There's a million and three reasons why I can't do that. He doesn't understand though. We've literally spent half of our nearly year and a half long relationship a part. That's not exactly easy. Those relationships rarely end well.

But that is life. I love my baby, I enjoy taking care of her. I just wish I had more companionship and a different set of circumstances. Hopefully I will ace my 2 classes this term.

It's Not Like I Expected It Would Be

My baby is a small person, but it is incredible how much she has grown since the day she was born. For fun I swaddled her in one of her newborn blankets the other night. Some babies love to be swaddled but Frogger did not. I was never very good at it anyways so I was happy to let that go. Now the blanket is too tiny to keep her swaddled. In the last 9 weeks she had grown 3 inches and gained 5 pounds.

Being a mother is different then I would have imagined, even after growing up surrounded by children. I never pictured myself breastfeeding in a J.C. Penny dressing room or relaying projectile diaper-time stories. When I was little I remember dreading doctor visits that ended in shots, but little did I know that I would dread Frogger's appointments for the same reason.

What I did suspect was that I would be more of a modern parent, unlike my own mom. However once the mother instincts finally kicked in about 6 hours after Frogger was born, I realized I was going to be just like my own protective mother. Frogger's dad thinks I spoil her with attention. I don't worry about her becoming overly clingy, after all my parents 'spoiled' me as a baby and I've spent the last several years trying to gain independence from them. I think perhaps it is in the parents who become over attached to the children, not the other way around.

Everyone is shocked when I tell them that she sleeps through the night and has since she was 4 weeks old. Every night baby and I snuggle up together in my bed and sleep for 8 to 10 hours.Sometime in the morning she will let me know she is hungry, and we'll both fall back asleep as she is eating. It's so lazy and lovely. I don't even have a crib. The bassinet was a waste of money-she was never going to sleep in it. My little singer has the ability to cry and cry without ceasing and has been doing so since she was born. But this way works for us. No bottles, no crib, no crying, no hassle.

Wow is my life different now.

Welcome Summer

I'm laying on my bed, with my sweaty baby plopped on my chest. I was attempting to sort through her clothes, taking out all the newborn outfits that she is too long to wear, and replacing them with the next sizes up, but she doesn't care to sleep alone. It's very warm in our bedroom as always, but it's extra sunny today. I didn't check the temperature.

Yesterday we spent the day by the pool. Two more weeks before the doctor says I'm allowed to jump into the water, but we dipped our feet in and were splashed 7 dozens time, every time someone forgot I was holding baby. She whimpered when I dipped her feet in the pool water. She didn't cry when later I dipped her feet in the hot tub.

It's summertime so my books are put away. I'm wondering what old and new places I can visit this season.

Life is good.