Oh Crap Oh Crap I've Got To Pass Clinical

Clinical is overwhelming. The focus is misplaced; it shouldn't be on demonstrating and getting skills checked off as much as it should be proficiency. Because of this I'm not doing as well as I could be. I get performance anxiety whenever one of the teachers watch me if I'm feeling even slightly under prepared. Sometimes I don't get a few times to practice before the teacher see's me and we just don't have that kind of time. Clinical only lasts 10 days.

The first couple of days I walked around convinced that I was going to be kicked out of the class. When I wasn't being watched I did slightly better. Learning was frustrating but I did enjoy the time I spent getting to know the residents on the skilled hallway.

This week I was in the ICF hallway and unfortunately I found many of the residents there less than endearing. Independently performing skills is a struggle for me. But I'm trying. I'm really really trying. The CNA I work under usually finds mistakes that I made. I make my partner help me a lot. Yes I'm improving but it's happening slowly. A big fear of mine is that if I start working as a CNA and have 6 or 7 residents to get ready in the morning that I'm just flat out not going to be able to do it. That's a bad thing. I have to be able to do it.

I only have three full days and one half day to get everything else done and become a decent student NA. That is so not enough time! I need an extra week. I'm seriously going to have to step up my game...this is so hard. Can I do this? I have too...I need this to be my job...